What is Psychotherapy for Children?

I am asked that question frequently.  The following is a brief description of how I approach my work with children and their families:  In my experience, the first place to start with therapy is with a parent (ideally parents) and child together. From that first session I can learn a lot about the interaction between parent and child and begin making suggestions to improve the relationship, increase communication and decrease conflict.

It is very important to give the parents hope. I actively appreciate what they are doing right and gently suggest ways of improving their interactions with their child/children.

I also focus on whether the parents are both in agreement about house rules, discipline, and all aspects of their child's life. When I find serious disagreement between the parents, I suggest a parenting session with just the parents present to help them sort out their differences and work on presenting a united front to their child/children.

This work is very rewarding because its focus is on prevention. I was first inspired to work with younger clients when session after session, I heard an adult say, "Steve, I wish someone had known what kind of emotional pain I was in when I was a kid."

What are the questions you have about therapy for children?

What do you wish others had known about you when you were younger?

For an appointment to discuss these issues further, please call: 203-624-7530.  I look forward to hearing from you.

Childhood Depression--Can it be diagnosed? Can it be treated?

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/29/magazine/29preschool-t.html


One of the points that I most agreed with in this article is the absolute necessity of direct parental participation in a child's therapy.


The parents need to understand the child's concerns; the most effective way to facilitate communication between parent and child; and, the importance of practicing the new behaviors at home between sessions. The article calls this Parent-Child-Interaction-Therapy.

One of the biggest obstacles to a child's successful psychotherapy is for one or both of the parents to feel that the therapy is unnecessary. Children are very sensitive to what their parents think and will not take the therapy seriously if mom or dad do not.

Have you taken one or more of your children to a psychotherapist?

What concerns you the most about your child/children?

Couple's Counseling

I have been conducting couple's counseling for a long time.  Most of the couples that come to me wait until they are in a profound crisis and feeling hopeless.

To create hope, the first intervention is to calm the crisis down and to help them gain some perspective. This reduces the strain between them and helps them to get into a problem solving state of mind.


The second intervention is to help them to grow in their ability to appreciate one another; to say out loud the things that they are both doing, but not getting credit for.

Most couples at some point start taking one another for granted and take the good things that the other one does as an expectation, not something to be appreciated.

In my 35 years in the mental health field, couple's counseling and family therapy are the most challenging to conduct. This is true whether someone is married or not, straight or gay, bi-sexual, lesbian, transgender or queer.  Age does not make a significant difference nor does years together as a couple.

One of the most important factors is early intervention into the problem or problems.  Common issues with couples involve problems with money, how power is shared within the relationship, children and parenting conflicts, step-children, ex-partners, in-laws, addiction issues (substance abuse, gambling, over spending, eating disorders, over working, compulsive sex, Internet, etc....).

What are the challenges you face as a couple?

Where do you want help?

In your experience, what works for you and your partner/spouse?

Issues People in their 20's Face

This is an excellent article about the issues that people in their 20's face. From my personal and professional experience, the article is spot-on accurate.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/22/magazine/22Adulthood-t.html?_r=1&emc=eta1

After reading the article, what questions come to your mind?

Are you 20 something?  If so, do you agree with the author?

Are you the parent of someone in their 20's?  What are your struggles?  What are your victories?

I look forward to hearing from you.